My Stout Monk Society was so good. We all connected in a house in Canada. Here are some notes I jotted to myself from our four days. We each took turns leading our brothers in a brief ‘word’. One ‘word’ was from 2 Cor. 1:8,9, on the hardships we suffer….

“This happened that we might not rely on ourselves, but on God, who raises the dead”.

We were asked to recognize our sufferings. What are the hardships in my life? Confess where I am relying on myself/my own strategies—what does self-reliance look like to me? Next, to rejoice in Jesus, our resurrected Hope!

One Monk asked us to consider the maladies of people who can discourage us in ministry.

1. People who lack/lose interest in what is happening- remember the disciples fell asleep on Jesus. “Don’t base your love and service to Christ on their commitment.” Invest hard in those who are serving, celebrate them. Careful you do not fall trap to cynicism—you may not know their full story right now.

2. People who betray you- there will be some you have invested in and they end up turning on you. Peter’s betrayal. Be careful not to demonize them, but pray for them. “Working through this experience is one of the most important means of your sanctification”.

3. People who abandon Christianity. Judas types. They drift away, or they love the world more or turn to a scandalous life. Can the gospel give you grace to greet them warmly and not erase them from your life? Will you let yourself grieve?

4. People who assault you, your character or motives.

5. People who are hostile to Christianity. There will be some who have incessant harshness toward Christians. Your kids will be mocked for their values etc. “Cultural Transformation without Spiritual warfare is an impossible exercise in futility”.

Another day we heard about our relationships with other men. We were asked to answer the question, “Are you a relational pygmy …

1. …when it comes to other men?” Isolation of men in our culture is epidemic. We keep our friendships surface level—sports, career, the market, maybe politics. “The more you involve yourself in the life of another man, your selfish bent is de-clawed.” Then he asked the tough one: Who are your pall bearers going to be? Which six people? [This reminded of the story of the guy who asked his small group, suppose you are lying in your casket and your friends are coming up and looking at you. What would you want them to say? One guy said, ‘That I was a good father,” another said, “A good friend.” Last man said, “I would want them to say, “Look, he’s moving!”

2. …in your relationship with your wife?” (I won’t share this one with you readers).

Another, and this is not all of them, but some samplings… How much More passages. We were reminded—How much more we will be saved from God’s anger; How much more we will be reconciled through His life; How much more did God’s grace overflow: How much more will those who receive God’s abundant grace and gift or righteousness reign in life; How much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit!

See why I think meeting with some others will help you now?

“If any pilgrim monk come from distant parts with wish as a guest to dwell in our monastery and will be content with the customs which he finds in this place, and does not perchance by his lavishness disturb the monastery, but is simply content with what he finds, he shall be received for as long a time as he wishes. If indeed he find fault with anything or expose it reasonably and with humility and charity, the Abbot shall discuss it prudently, lest perchance God has sent him for this very purpose. But if he has been found gossipy or divisive in the time of his sojourn as the guest, not only ought he not be joined in the body of the monastery, but also it shall be said to him honestly that he must depart. If he does not go, let two stout monks, in the name of God, explain the matter to him.”

Benedict coined the term “stout monk” in reference to men able to guard and protect the community from enemies and intruders. He put them to work on tasks and mission requiring strength, courage and integrity (sure they loved beer too). When necessary, they would go and escort the intruder out. Yet they were called to act in pairs, not in isolation. They were together. The protected one another as well as their community.

Do you want or need to start a Stout Monk Society? We say we all need community, but are we practicing community? Now I would suggest that the kind of community you need, at this level, the Stout Monk level, will not be found in your own congregation. Some strongly disagree and believe that elders are elders and the local church ought to be the place where everyone can be real including the pastor. True. But, if one of your leaders opens up and reveals some black area of his life or raging doubts, he isn’t going to lose his paying job. Be careful to whom you give bullets to. Some day they might shoot you with them.

I suspect that because you know that instinctively, instead of looking for real brotherly community, you have bought the lie that it’s not for you…and you have remained a loner. Let’s change course now. I want to help you help others in the same predicament.

In forming a Stout Monk Society, Our objective is to halt the endless loss of great leaders.

Begin with Prayer. Ask God to show you who you would invite into your community. Wait for God to answer.

It works best with 6 men. A good ratio is to have older guys and a couple of younger guys. They should be guys who are ready to get real and quit the bull… admit they are pooped, pissed or whatever… admit their willingness to have others speak into their lives, and also listen to God through them. Willing to watch each other’s back. Find other pastors outside your city. Maybe look for ministry leaders, like guys who lead Young Life or a mission agency. Trust me, they are lonely leaders too! One of my chapters has a man who is a business entrepreneur par excellence and is a donor to Christian ministries. He said he never had anything like this in business.

Next you’ll need a house. Ask someone to donate it to you for a few days to keep cost down. No TV. No ESPN. It’s just for 3-4 days.

So what do you do for the three to four days?

Each one will be responsible to facilitate 3 prayer/ mentor sessions:

1. 75 minutes where you lead/ facilitate prayer on one important thing God has been teaching you in recent months- applying it to the rest and helping all pray this into each other’s lives.
2. 75 minutes facilitated prayer and counsel for your personal and family life. Let others know how things are going personally and have all gather round you to listen/ pray for you and your family
3. 75 minutes facilitated prayer for you/ your ministry. This is getting down to 1 or 2 key areas that you could use listening prayer and counsel from men of wisdom. Come with a few ideas written down for all to think about.
4. Lots and lots of free time and bocce ball etc.

Work in shifts for shopping, cooking and clean up. Plan on doing one night out at a nice eatery. Again, it’s not expensive to do this. And it’s not a boiler plate thing either. Let community take place. You can’t manufacture it anyway. All you are doing is providing a great venue for good things to happen…being intentional. God will show up! Let me hear how it goes. This blog will serve as a great venue to brag about what God is doing through community. “Give it a try. I think you’ll be glad you did!”

Stout Monks are there for one another. They trust the community to protect, guard and give assistance.

Singer, songwriter, Susan Ashton writes,

I’ve had the faith that gave me strength for moving any mountainside
I’ve felt the solid ground beneath my feet
But I’ve had the bread of idleness while drinking from a well of doubt
And it shakes the core of all I believe
Sometimes I feel like I’m as close as your shadow
And sometimes I feel like I’m looking up at you from the bottom of the Grand Canyon.

That is my story. That is life. That is ministry life…pastoral life. And it can only get worse the longer we live in isolation. The longer we choose not to link up with other Stout Monks and defend. En-courage = put courage in.

My friend John (co-founder of our Stout Monk Society) wrote…”When I think of Stout Monks, I think of men on the front line. Bold. Filled with zeal for Christ and his mission. Ready to face the opponent. A select and increasingly rare man. Every one is teachable. Most in need of strategic, just in time counsel. All in need of prayer, friendship and brotherhood. Men who face weariness, discouragement and loneliness.

Time for us to ‘man up’ and get a fellow Stout Monk by our side. To admit we are toast if we try to go it alone any longer. Time to be willing to make a courageous decision to get some friends, brothers…and be teachable, humble and willing to give up our busy-ness and give and take from other pastors in similar mold.

It also works when some older guys take some younger guys with them into community. Both are helped. Both are strengthened.

More later on what we do at Stout Monks.

He mentioned a quote I had used… I use it a lot in training leaders, elders, pastors and church planters. I stole it from Steve years ago (I have looked it up myself and its legit). It’s the Rule of St. Benedict, from the Benedictine Monastery, 6th Century.

“If any pilgrim monk come from distant parts with wish as a guest to dwell in our monastery and will be content with the customs which he finds in this place, and does not perchance by his lavishness disturb the monastery, but is simply content with what he finds, he shall be received for as long a time as he wishes. If indeed he find fault with anything or expose it reasonably and with humility and charity, the Abbot shall discuss it prudently, lest perchance God has sent him for this very purpose. But if he has been found gossipy or divisive in the time of his sojourn as the guest, not only ought he not be joined in the body of the monastery, but also it shall be said to him honestly that he must depart. If he does not go, let two stout monks, in the name of God, explain the matter to him.”

Then we began to talk seriously about pastor friends who had blown themselves up…abandoned the ministry, their call and sometimes their family. Most were men who had been faithful, godly pastors, caring for a church… most for a long time. Then wham.

We confessed our independence. We are basically loners. Ministry can have that effect on people. (Or is it loners are attracted to ministry?) We repented to God and one another.

Benedict coined the term “stout monk” in reference to men able to guard and protect the community from enemies and intruders. He put them to work on tasks and mission requiring strength, courage and integrity (sure they loved beer too). When necessary, they would go and escort the intruder out. Yet they were called to act in pairs, not in isolation. They were together. They protected one another as well as their community.

Our conversation led to forming the Stout Monk Society. Our objective is to halt the exodus. To raise the fallen. We each invited other men to join us (we have six, but think we will add an Abbott). We need each other’s counsel, prayer and friendship. Though its only annual, it has been great. Rewarding.

We spend a few days together in community (not a real monastery but we share cooking, cleaning and other stuff (for those not reformed I refrain from causing you to stumble, but a pastor said to me once, ‘when I became a Christian I gave up all my vices. When I got reformed I got them all back’).

I will continue this blog later… but let me ask you: Do you long for a Stout Monk Society?

Tom Wood has been a pastor for 25 years. He has planted and pastored two churches and has served as a church planting trainer and coach for the Presbyterian Church in America. He is currently the president of Church Multiplication Ministries, in Atlanta. His mission is starting, strengthening and multiplying grace centered churches and church planting networks, through coaching and consults with church planting pastors, leaders and emerging leaders.

One of the greatest inventions in my lifetime has to be the iPod. Music, messages and movies all in one place. The new version even has radio capability. I heard a song on TV and went to iTunes and downloaded it into my library. A while back I downloaded the Brown Sessions, listened to Steve interview Dan Allender, and Mark Driscoll. Amazing technology.

Most of all it’s the music though. Music is a means of grace… yesterday at church as we were singing I thought about how there aren’t any other places in our society that groups of people get together and sing. We have SomeOne and Something about which to sing. Steve says often, it’s the laughter that sets us apart from both the pagans and the religious elite. That’s true. But a close second is the music. Which leads me to another thought. The Gospel of grace—freedom from the penalty and power of sin in life through Jesus—is music to the soul. Radical freedom and love from God the Father toward us is more than words…or lyrics to the song. It is the music. It is the tune. Some of the preachers I have listened to have the words but not the music. “For God so loved…He sent His One and only Son, so that all who believe in Him should not perish but have Life”. Do you hear the music? The joy? The Tune of the Gospel?

“Joy to the world, the Lord is come, Let earth receive her King; Let every heart prepare him room, And heaven and nature sing! No more let sins and sorrows grow, Nor thorns infest the ground; He comes to make His blessings flow, Far as the curse is found!

He rules the world with truth and grace, And makes the nations prove, The glories of His righteousness, And wonders of His love!” Isaac Watts

Notice in Watts’ famous Christmas song the grand, cosmic significance of Jesus’ saving activity. The music of the gospel moves us out of the narrow realm of our self-preoccupation. My friend Bob Heppe wrote, “The Gospel is God’s message of liberation: from guilt, alienation, and every bondage that hinders the human race from being fruitful for and reflecting the glory of God. The good news that Jesus preached is that He, as Lord of the cosmos, is now in the business of recapturing a runaway planet. He came to destroy the works of the Devil — all of them, not merely the psychological one’s that plague middle class Americans — and to bring the world under His saving authority. That means He came to reverse the effects of the fall, “as far as the curse is found.” The gospel of the kingdom announces nothing less than God’s intention, and activity, to replace the effects of the fall (sin, guilt, sickness, hunger, injustice, oppression, poverty, bondage, dehumanization, and death) with His Kingdom righteousness; and His work will not be finished until His redemption covers the whole earth.”

Tom Wood has been a pastor for 25 years. He has planted and pastored two churches and has served as a church planting trainer and coach for the Presbyterian Church in America. He is currently the president of Church Multiplication Ministries, in Atlanta. His mission is starting, strengthening and multiplying grace centered churches and church planting networks, through coaching and consults with church planting pastors, leaders and emerging leaders.

I attended two different churches today. Both sang the songs we sing in the USA. (one better than the other but again I digress). I listen to and evaluate about 25 sermons each year and write reviews for church planter wanna-bees. I also have coached a number of pastors in preaching. Today’s “two-sermon Sunday” caught my attention. Both were different in delivery and content. Both taught from the Bible. Both loved Jesus and are obviously loved by Him, so please don’t misunderstand what I am about to say. I am not criticizing any of my dear brothers, either here or in the USA. And trust me, I am a better coach than practitioner. (and I really wish after listening to Steve for over 25 years, I were better).

Brothers, may I humbly remind us of two things: one, we are strangers in a strange land and preaching Christ and his grace is for both believer and non-believer. Be careful you are not simply talking “Christianese” to Christians. But secondly, it’s the gospel of grace. It really is all about Jesus Christ and the radical nature of his love and grace. The way you get in to a relationship with Jesus is by grace through faith and repentance and the way you live in grace is through ongoing faith and repentance, not by the rules. Jesus didn’t die so he could give your congregation an easier list of rules to live by. He died to set them free.

I want to tell you that I thought Zach’s blog, Heroes and Heretics, was so real and honest. Thanks Zach. I think that’s a great example of what our freedom allows us to enjoy. And when we preach with that kind of remarkable authenticity, our watching world of non-believers may just sit up and listen. When Jesus is lifted up as the only solution for our plight, lives, communities and cities will be transformed. God’s glory and our good!

The following is from an old British pastor from the mid 1800’s, named C H McIntosh.
“A man may be called to preach the gospel in the same place for years, and he may, at times, feel burdened by the thought of having to address the same audience, on the same theme, week after week, month after month, year after year. He may feel at times at a loss for something new, something fresh, some variety. It will greatly help such to remember that the one grand theme of the preacher is Christ. The power to handle that theme is the Holy Ghost; and the one to whom that theme is to be unfolded is the poor lost sinner. Furthermore, it is well for the preacher to bear in mind, on every fresh occasion to rising to preach, that those to whom he preaches are really ignorant of the gospel, and hence he should preach as though it were the very first time his audience had ever heard the message, and the first time he had ever delivered it. To preach the gospel is really to unfold the heart of God, the person and work of Christ; and all this by the present energy of the Holy Ghost, from the exhaust-less treasury of holy Scripture”.

Of course, it might also help if you had a deep voice that sounded like God… but once again, I digress.

Tom Wood has been a pastor for 25 years. He has planted and pastored two churches and has served as a church planting trainer and coach for the Presbyterian Church in America. He is currently the president of Church Multiplication Ministries, in Atlanta. His mission is starting, strengthening and multiplying grace centered churches and church planting networks, through coaching and consults with church planting pastors, leaders and emerging leaders.

In need of encouragement? Subscribe to Tom’s weekly dose of grace at GracedAgain.com.

Because we are all pastors, we could apply that to ministry life. Instead of putting in a 50 hour week, as if ministry is logged in as hours done, maybe we should come up with a point system for pastors. So if you do a funeral for a friend, its 500 points. If its for a child, its, 1000 points. If you deal with a couple and one’s infidelity, it’s another 500 points. If you have a deacons meeting or elders meeting that week, that’s 2,000 points. Every week is a sermon. For some its only 100 points, for others its 500-1000 points. And then there’s the administrative junk and the phone calls…and emails and…

Makes sense doesn’t it? Pastoral life is more than sermon prep and making polite conversation with little old ladies. It’s tough. And maybe we need a point system that says, when you get to this amount of stuff, stop. No more pastoral work for the week.

Anyway, here’s the kicker. I checked with a commercial pilot friend of mine who flies all over the country (USA). I asked him about the point system. He said, “Not true.” They fly by hours. Oh well, it still makes sense doesn’t it?

But if we decide to put something in place for pastors—to keep us from getting pooped—we should also think of the good stuff as well. So when you see someone really get the gospel of grace—maybe a new convert or where they get graced again, maybe that’s minus 2,000 in the point system. Or when a healing occurs or a sermon really worked and a few people ‘got it’—minus 500 points. Or when the teens return from a mission’s trip and a few want to serve locally as well… Or a half day of prayer, alone with the Father, restores one’s soul. Subtract 1,000. There are some things that put the energy back aren’t there? Makes me want to be a pastor again just thinking about it…

Tom Wood has been a pastor for 25 years. He has planted and pastored two churches and has served as a church planting trainer and coach for the Presbyterian Church in America. He is currently the president of Church Multiplication Ministries, in Atlanta. His mission is starting, strengthening and multiplying grace centered churches and church planting networks, through coaching and consults with church planting pastors, leaders and emerging leaders.

In need of encouragement? Subscribe to Tom’s weekly dose of grace at GracedAgain.com.

A friend recently defined leadership for me this way:

“Leadership is disappointing people at a pace they can tolerate.”

That makes more sense, in a real, down to earth type of church setting.

I work with leaders all the time. So I have been thinking about it a lot lately. Most of the men with whom I went to graduate school, who were preparing to be pastors, seemed mostly concerned with pastoral type studies; i.e., exegeting a passage of scripture, pastoral counseling, teaching and preaching. I don’t think they thought of themselves as leaders. Granted, it was a long time ago, but the emerging leaders I have the joy to work with are not unlike the old guys (I am an old guy now) I was with…instead of being a pastor of one church, they see themselves as parish ministers…they carve out a community and become the parish priest in a sense, even to those who don’t’ attend church.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the missional zeal and the idea of a church caring for its immediate ministry sphere. I think that is biblical and wise.

But Leadership wasn’t for my peers and doesn’t seem so for the new generation either. Have we an aversion to leadership? Have we gotten so burned by bad leaders, by corrupt and self-serving leaders that we don’t want anything to do with it? I pray not so. We desperately need leaders in our churches, in our communities and in our nation.

Our call is a call to influence others by grace. That means leadership at some level, because that is the essence of leadership- to have influence on others.

If you are a pastor, no matter what the size is of your congregation, you have influence. That is the nature of the job. You are a leader. Perhaps it’s time to study it and learn it. Leverage it. Even if you are afraid of leading, you are still a leader. Jesus can teach you. He will lead you as you lead others.

In the movie Forrest Gump, after Lt. Dan had lost his legs in Vietnam, they were both recovering in a hospital. One night, Lt. Dan yanked Gump off his bed (he was wounded saving the men) and started yelling at Gump for saving him back in the jungle. He said, “You should have left me out there to die, that was my destiny, but look at me now, I’m nothing but a cripple, a legless freak. I was Lt. Dan Taylor, and I was supposed to die with my men, that was my destiny and you cheated me. I was Lt. Dan Taylor.” Gump says, “You’re still Lt. Dan.”

I’m not sure how you see yourself today…or what you think of as your destiny. But one thing I do know, God’s calling to be a leader in the church is God’s enabling. I Thess. 5:24 .

Tom Wood has been a pastor for 25 years. He has planted and pastored two churches and has served as a church planting trainer and coach for the Presbyterian Church in America. He is currently the president of Church Multiplication Ministries, in Atlanta. His mission is starting, strengthening and multiplying grace centered churches and church planting networks, through coaching and consults with church planting pastors, leaders and emerging leaders.

In need of encouragement? Subscribe to Tom’s weekly dose of grace at GracedAgain.com.

“Oh, baby, baby, it’s a wild world
It’s hard to get by just upon a smile
Oh, baby, baby, it’s a wild world
I’ll always remember you like a child, girl

You know I’ve seen a lot of what the world can do
And it’s breaking my heart in two
Because I never wanna see you a sad girl
Don’t be a bad girl

But if you wanna leave, take good care
I hope you make a lot of nice friends out there
But just remember there’s a lot of bad and beware”

He wrote the song to himself as he was getting ready to leave home and start out on his own career. He had grown up in a religious home…his dad was a Catholic and his mom a Baptist. They lived in London, in the Soho district.

Years later, he converted to Islam and now goes by the name Yusuf Islam.

One of the reasons I got pooped as a pastor was being part of stories like this. Someone you think is getting the gospel; getting faith; getting “living by grace”…maybe even coming out of a traditional religious background… and despite knowing—“I’ve seen a lot of what the world can do…just remember there’s a lot of bad out there (and in you as well, I might add)…oh, baby is a Wild world”.

It breaks my heart in two when they throw it all away. Men and women who decided to throw away years of marriage…years of hard work building a business…years of ministry and “oh baby baby is a wild world”. Sadness, broken lives, devastated hearts.

I’m getting pooped just remembering their faces and stories.

You’ve heard this before I’m sure, but I did feel like I was standing at a cliff warning people, “Beware, I’ve been standing here watching people get too close to the edge and some have slipped, fallen off and been royally messed up. And some smiled and said, “Thank you so much Pastor Tom, that is so kind of you. You are the best pastor I have ever had”, then they walked over to the edge and jumped.

If you are pastor of people…I mean you love them and care for them, it’s going to break your heart in two when people jump off. I don’t have any easy made answers to the heartache. Love hurts…sometimes a lot. One way to find comfort in the pain is to remember that you are not responsible for their actions. Another is to remember that the “God of all grace” can find them at the bottom and bring them out of the pit. That’s where he finds all of us.

Tom Wood has been a pastor for 25 years. He has planted and pastored two churches and has served as a church planting trainer and coach for the Presbyterian Church in America. He is currently the president of Church Multiplication Ministries, in Atlanta. His mission is starting, strengthening and multiplying grace centered churches and church planting networks, through coaching and consults with church planting pastors, leaders and emerging leaders.

In need of encouragement? Subscribe to Tom’s weekly dose of grace at GracedAgain.com.

Every morning when I wake up I have a song playing in my head. It’s different every day. Sometimes it’s a SCC tune “Its all Yours Lord, Yours Lord, Everything is Yours…” or “Anticipation, Anticipation is making me late, is keeping me waiting”. Two mornings ago, out of nowhere, “Love the one you’re with, Love the one you’re with, dit, dit, dit, dit, dit, dit dit dit”. This morning, though, it was an old (1990’s worship tune), “You have been a shelter Lord, to every generation, to ev’ry generation. A sanctuary from the storm, to every generation Lord…” I can’t explain why one tune over another. Perhaps today was because yesterday I was in church holding my new grandson worshiping the Lord!

Now I happen to think that the old guys who told us that the means of grace were “the Word, the Sacrament, Prayer, Church and Holy Spirit”, well…if they had had iTunes, they would have included music. iTunes is the greatest invention known to man since the printing press. When I wake up and I have a tune I haven’t heard in a long time, I go to the iTunes store and bam, I can listen to the whole thing. Music is a means of grace.

A man I was talking to about tunes playing in my head responded, “I wake up almost every day angry”. The man was a pastor. I understand. There is a lot about which he should be angry. There are a few churches that make me angry too…but I digress.

Music is a window into my soul. I fill a lot of my soul with lyrics that remind me of the truth about the Gospel and grace and Jesus’ love. Why? Cause there is a whisper in the Universe. It was put there in the garden…”God is not for you. Make life work for yourself”. Martin Luther said, “To doubt the good will of God is an inborn suspicion of God with all of us…”

For me, one of the means of remembering God has not abandoned me is music.

Luther continues, “In all these difficulties we have only one support, the Gospel of Christ. To hold on to it, that is the trick . . . All these things cry out against us, death thunders at us, the devil roars at us. In the midst of the clamor the Spirit of Christ cries in our hearts, ‘Abba, Father.’ . . . The Spirit cries because of our weakness…(and) is sent forth into our hearts…to assure us of the grace of God.”

For the sake of your soul, get an Mp3 player. Plug in, go for a walk and listen to some good tunes. Calming jazz, Steven Curtis Chapman, some great guitar music by Keaggy, the sultry sounds of Anita Baker or you hardly ever go wrong with U2, especially their new CD. Worship the Lord using hymns and spiritual songs.

Oh yeah iTunes has sermons, Key Life, and other great teaching. It’s truly amazing. I hope you begin to wake up with tunes in your head and not anger or something worse…doubting God.

Tom Wood has been a pastor for 25 years. He has planted and pastored two churches and has served as a church planting trainer and coach for the Presbyterian Church in America. He is currently the president of Church Multiplication Ministries, in Atlanta. His mission is starting, strengthening and multiplying grace centered churches and church planting networks, through coaching and consults with church planting pastors, leaders and emerging leaders.

In need of encouragement? Subscribe to Tom’s weekly dose of grace at GracedAgain.com.