Stout Monk Society Pt 3 – A Simple Answer for Pooped Pastors
Tom Wood May 25 2010 - 4 Comments
The Rule of St. Benedict, from the Benedictine Monastery, 6th Century.
“If any pilgrim monk come from distant parts with wish as a guest to dwell in our monastery and will be content with the customs which he finds in this place, and does not perchance by his lavishness disturb the monastery, but is simply content with what he finds, he shall be received for as long a time as he wishes. If indeed he find fault with anything or expose it reasonably and with humility and charity, the Abbot shall discuss it prudently, lest perchance God has sent him for this very purpose. But if he has been found gossipy or divisive in the time of his sojourn as the guest, not only ought he not be joined in the body of the monastery, but also it shall be said to him honestly that he must depart. If he does not go, let two stout monks, in the name of God, explain the matter to him.”
Benedict coined the term “stout monk” in reference to men able to guard and protect the community from enemies and intruders. He put them to work on tasks and mission requiring strength, courage and integrity (sure they loved beer too). When necessary, they would go and escort the intruder out. Yet they were called to act in pairs, not in isolation. They were together. The protected one another as well as their community.
Do you want or need to start a Stout Monk Society? (more…)
Burnout: Three Dimensions One Experience
Steve Vensel May 18 2010 - No Comment
As I’ve worked with and cared for pastors over the past twenty five years, one of the particularly nasty hazards is that of “burnout.” In spite of the popularity of the term, most people are unaware of the complexity of the problem and often fail to recognize it soon enough to make a difference. Burnout is a particularly sneaky assassin, and although it has the destructive force of an IED, it usually approaches from behind and strangles the love out of its victim. Yeah, that’s not a typo, it’s a love killer as well as a ministry ender.
Ministry takes place within a spiritual economy of personal sacrifice that is relationally, physically and emotionally demanding. Burnout is always directly related to the larger work environment and is always in response to relationships and stressors. There is no single cause of burnout. The research has found that (more…)
What I’ve learned about “Quiet Times”
Lea Clower May 10 2010 - 1 Comment
My good friend Jim Suddath played basketball for Duke in the early 80’s when they went to the final four. We worked together on the same church staff for 13 years and had a lot of fun, especially since I graduated from North Carolina, Chapel Hill. I used to call Duke, “Durham Community College” and he would say, “At least I did more than drink my way through school!”
Anyway, I will never forget the time I said, “Practice makes perfect” and Jim corrected me by say “Perfect practice makes perfect.” I’ve thought a lot about that over the years, and it is so true. If you practice bad habits, you simply perfect what’s wrong. I was a Navy flight instructor, an LSO (Landing Signal Officer) in Pensacola, FL teaching jet students how to land aboard ship for their first time. Every single landing at the field in preparation for going to the ship and every arrested landing aboard ship was graded, critiqued, and debriefed. This was true for the rest of their career as carrier pilots. “Arriving alive” wasn’t enough. It had to be done exceptionally well, and especially at night. Interestingly enough the grading system still let you know you weren’t perfect and that there was always work to be done. A “perfect” approach and landing grade was an OK. OK, underlined, with no comment. A near perfect pass was still just an OK. For a perfectionist like me, basketball, carrier landings, life, and “quiet times” can be real bummers. (more…)
Maturity and Leadership…
Pete Alwinson May 04 2010 - 2 Comments
Let’s see now, how spiritually mature do I need to be to retain my position as a pastor anyway? One leader said: “I hate being a Christian leader when I stink at being a Christian.” Maturity and leadership…Christlikeness and being an undershepherd of Christ. Of course they go together, but how?
This past semester I opened each class session of Theology of Ministry at the seminary where I am an adjunct professor, with a character study through I Timothy 3 and Titus 1. The qualifications for elder/pastor are clear and while my theological tradition is heavy on the intellectual grasp of the great doctrines of the faith, the Pastoral Epistles emphasize character in Christ as the hallmark of spiritual leaders. Of course it is Christ like maturity AND a grasp of the great doctrines of the faith which much characterize a pastor. I get that. Contemplation on these qualifications has led me to some honest realizations…to wit (as Steve Brown would say)
…I’ve been a senior pastor for some 28 years and I still have a long way to go in spiritual maturity when it comes to these qualifications for elder/pastor. Specifically I am not fully “respectable” (I Timothy 3.2). I still lack love in amazing ways. I’ve found that new life challenges and trials can still be surprisingly difficult even if you’ve walked with Jesus and worked for Jesus for a long time. (more…)
Stop Being Lazy
Steve McKinney April 26 2010 - No Comment
I know a lot of lazy people.
People who would rather spend the day planted on their couch than anywhere else.
People who choose take-out over home cooked, every night of the week.
People who would rather have a root canal than go do a workout.
Sure, I know that we all have our occasional lazy day on the couch, but lately it seems that more and more people are turning laziness into a career.
What about you? Check if the following describe you: (more…)
“My Top Ten Mistakes In Ministry (That I Can Share Publicly)” #5
Steve Childers April 15 2010 - No Comment
Mistake #5: Not Understanding that the Way Up is the Way Down
“If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness.” 2 Corinthians 11:30 (ESV)
This is the fifth in a series of blog posts called, “My Top Ten Mistakes in Ministry (That I Can Share Publicly.)” After many years of ministry experience as a church planter, pastor and seminary professor, I think I’ve finally learned that one of the best kept secrets to surviving well in the ministry is to stop making the same old mistakes that others (like me) have been making for decades. Instead, let’s all start making some brand new, bold, innovative and creative mistakes!
We began this series with an introduction called, “Ladies First” in which veteran church planter wife, Shari Thomas, addressed the tough topic, What I Wish I Had Known About Church Planting from the perspective of the church planter’s/pastor’s spouse. We then took a look at:
- Mistake #1 (these are in no intentional order) called, “Failing to Understand the Importance of How I Define Ministry Success.”
- Mistake #2 called, Managing My Time and Not Managing My Life
- Mistake #3: Not Understanding the Difference Between my Goals and Desires.
- Mistake #4: Not Understanding the Difference Between Pursuing the Grace of God and the God of Grace.
This time we’ll take a brief look at another common mistake church leaders make that I wish someone had told me about before I went into the ministry.
Mistake #5: Not Understanding that the Way Up is the Way Down (more…)
Stout Monk Society – Pt 2
Tom Wood March 30 2010 - No Comment
As I continue my work with frontier type leaders, I am more convinced than ever for the necessity of Stout Monk Society type gatherings. Burn out, flame out, blowouts and ups are inevitable if we try to continue on our own.
Stout Monks are there for one another. They trust the community to protect, guard and give assistance.
Singer, songwriter, Susan Ashton writes,
I’ve had the faith that gave me strength for moving any mountainside
I’ve felt the solid ground beneath my feet
But I’ve had the bread of idleness while drinking from a well of doubt
And it shakes the core of all I believe
Sometimes I feel like I’m as close as your shadow
And sometimes I feel like I’m looking up at you from the bottom of the Grand Canyon.
That is my story. That is life. That is ministry life…pastoral life. And it can only get worse the longer we live in isolation. The longer we (more…)
Mobbing
Steve Vensel March 23 2010 - 9 Comments
But they all cried out together, “Away with this man…” – Luke 23:18
Since this is my first blog entry, and hopefully not my last, I guess I should give a very short introduction. I’ve been a practicing counselor for 30 years; I’ve served twenty of those years in church and para-church ministries; I have always provided services to pastors and their families for no fees; Steve Brown was my pastor for many years; I am the Executive Director of PastorServe South Florida – a ministry to care, support, counsel and love on pastors; I’m also a doctoral student researching clergy stress, burnout and mobbing. Mob what?
The fact that you are reading a blog for pooped pastors means that you may well have experienced something that until fairly recently has not had a name attached to it. Its a devastating experience that often results in pastors leaving the ministry. Its called mobbing. Although this may not sound familiar, every pastor I talk too tells me they have either been mobbed or know a dozen other pastors that have experienced it.
Mobbing is (more…)
Finding the Perfect Place
Lea Clower March 16 2010 - No Comment
This stuff is only for the sick, screwed-up, dis-eased, and dysfunctional. If you aren’t any of these, you are (1) wasting your time reading (2) in denial or delusion, and (3) going to write me a nasty letter, please don’t, I’m doing the best I can here.
These are my opinions, experience, insanity, and thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours in seminary, the pastorate, and therapy (and some time with the Lord) to become so “brilliant” and make such outrageous statements.
My hope is to help a few, or at least let them know there is someone “out there” who is just as out there as they are. Like Alcoholics Anonymous, my favorite friends with whom I share a similar fate, one drunk helping another drunk stay sober (not just dry) one day at a time…sounds a little like the Christian life doesn’t it?
Finding the Perfect Place…My Obsession with Externals
If I had the right job/church, then… (more…)
5 Stupid Things Healthy People Do
Steve McKinney February 22 2010 - No Comment
You are not a stupid person. Not by any means.
In fact, it’s my guess that you’re healthier than most.
You probably exercise regularly. You watch what you eat. You keep up-to-date on the latest health concerns. You don’t binge on sugar.
And you never – ever – eat fast food. Well, almost never.
But you do have a few unhealthy skeletons in your closet -ones that you probably aren’t even aware of.
The following 5 Stupid Things are frequently committed by health conscious people. Once you break these bad habits, you’ll find that achieving your weight loss goals just became a whole lot easier. (more…)
